Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me!
Birthdays are a big deal at this house, at least for our kids, and I think deep down I'll always feel like that little girl who still gets so excited when it's her birthday. But this year I feel like I already have so much, so many blessings, that I need to focus on other people and give more joy to them.
I saw a blog about a woman who did 38 random acts of kindness on her 38th birthday (see her amazing blog: http://mixmingleglow.com/blog/?p=1358). I thought that was a perfect idea, but for me and the 3 little girls, I don't think I could make a full day of it yet (maybe when they're older and could come along to help).
So I opted for a week of doing as many acts of kindness to friends and strangers alike. Turns out, I couldn't stop after just one week, so it is continuing. I am trying to do at least one good thing -- small or large -- for someone else every day.
Here is my list and if you are interested, maybe you can join in and do random acts of kindness too!
1. Made dinner for a friend and her family since she's recovering from surgery.
2. Gave money to a stranger in need. I heard her story from a friend who knew of a pregnant woman who didn't have much money and was struggling to pay bills and prepare for the birth of her baby. I gave money to my friend who then delivered it (and many other gifts from other people) to the mom-to-be. I feel like a small part of a bigger group who came together to bless this woman and her little baby.
3. Supported a friend by just listening and telling her I am here for her while she's going through a tough family situation.
4. Told a sorority sister that I am proud of her and believe in her ability to be a leader.
5. Brought a piece of pie home for my husband after he watched the kids so I could go to dinner for another friend's birthday.
6. Called an old friend out of the blue and told her how much her friendship means to me. She called me a few days later to say how my call was a gift from God because was having a really hard time and hearing how much she meant to me made her feel a million times better. Her call back to me blessed me more than she could know!
7. Bought a CD for a friend that I know she'd like and mailed it to her as a surprise.
8. Sent a card to a friend who I don't see often enough just saying "hi."
9. Told a dear friend and sorority sister how much I admire what she does to help other sisters (most of the time doing things that no one knows about except her and the sister in need). Her ability to give of her time and talents and unwavering support is something I strive to be like.
10. Told my daughters how much I love them and how proud I am for specific things they had done that day.
11. Made dinner for a neighbor who just had a baby.
12. Took a gift to another neighbor who also had a baby.
13. Gave a friend a compliment.
14. Let a stranger go in front of me in the check out line at the grocery store.
15. Increased our tithes to our church because of many reasons, one being that the staff does so many wonderful things for people in our community who need help while going through a tough time.
16. Gave a stranger a compliment and watched her face light up when I talked to her.
17. Prayed for a friend's son as he had surgery -- prayers for healing, comfort and peace for him and his family.
This is a short list, but one I want to continue, not just around my birthday, but every day. It helps me to count my blessings (which are too many to count) and to serve others as Christ calls us to do.
Saturday, October 6, 2012
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
A Mother's Work Is Never Done
"A mother's work is never done."
You've heard the old adage, and it couldn't be more true. I've always considered myself a busy person. In high school and college I was involved in a lot of different organizations and sports and held leadership positions in many of them, all while keeping up my grades. I often felt overscheduled. After college I worked at a local television station where typically one's life should revolve around work in order to succeed. I worked long hours, weekends, holidays -- I was constantly on the go and always running from one shoot to another. BUSY. Or so I thought.
Fast forward a few years and I have my first child. Within a few weeks I realized I had never been this busy in my life. My husband and I talked about the biggest surprise for us was the continuousness of parenthood. Not that we expected it to be a 9-5 kind of gig, but just that there is no break. Ever. I went back to work in 3 months and found the work/life balance was difficult to say the least. It was managable, but I never felt 100% committed to my job or 100% like a good mother. I've heard this is common and pretty much how many mothers feel for the rest of their lives.
Once the hectic, newborn, holy-crap-I-have-a-baby-to-take-care-of period passed, I found a rountine and rhythm to my daily life. Yet, nothing prepared me for twins. NOTHING. CAN. PREPARE. YOU. FOR. TWINS. From the overwhelming nausea I had 24 hours a day to the constant discomfort I felt as I grew and grew and GREW, my twins' pregnancy was a strong indicator at just how different this time around was going to be. Once my twins were born, life became a juggling act with little to no sleep and more people depending on me than ever before. When people say, "I had kids one year apart, so that's the same thing as twins or even harder than twins" (which I've heard more frequently than you'd think) I want to:
1. laugh at them and their ridiculous lie
2. ask them how many babies came out of their ladytown in the span of 20 minutes
3. ask if their oldest kid could hold its head up when the baby was born (try holding two babies who both need head/neck support)
4. ask if they breastfed both of their kids at the same time. around the clock. every day.
5. find out where they get their drugs that distort reality and request they them share with me
I look back now and laugh at how easy it was to have only one baby to take care of. I only had to load/unload one baby into the car in the rain. I only had to get up in the middle of the night when one baby cried. I got to nap when my baby napped because I didn't have a 2-year-old who needed my attention.
How did I ever think having one baby was hard?
Clearly, the adjustment period from 0-1 kid is tough. Going from only worrying about myself to making this other little person my top priority for everything is definitely a life change. It is a change I was happy to make and one that I'm so glad I did make, but it was still a grown up moment.
Finding time to myself when the twins were newborns and my oldest daughter was not even 2 and half years old was impossible. If I could go to the bathroom alone, it was a freaking vacation. If I could get a shower in every 3 days, I was happy (I'm sure my husband was as well). I was breastfeeding about 10-12 hours a day, every day and changing about 30 diapers a day because our toddler was not yet potty trained. This didn't leave much time for eating and sleeping, let alone any time for myself.
I don't want this to sound like a "woe is me" kind of speech. While I had a lot to deal with, I am extremely blessed to have a supportive husband who is very hands on as a parent as well as family who helps us in so many ways. There are so many moms who deal with situations that are much more difficult from kids with special needs, to being a single mom to having a parent away serving in the miltary to caring for children with health problems. I feel so blessed that my children -- who sometimes make me want to pull out my hair -- are, and always have been, healthy. This is a gift that I cherish and for which I am extremely grateful.
My life as a mom of 3 was, at times, sad and overwhelming, but is also an amazing experience filled with many joyful, thankful moments with these children who I grew and birthed and now have the immense honor of raising. I remember so many times when the twins were just days/weeks old, looking at them in awe at how they are so different, yet so connected to each other. I remember being so bleary-eyed and exhausted, but looking into their little faces and getting teary at what precious miracles there were and how blessed I am to be their mother. I still have moments like that, but I believe those first few months with your baby is about as close as one can get to being in a room with God. There's a quote by Charles Dickens that I keep coming back to: "It is no small thing that they, who are so fresh from God, love us." Babies stare at their mommy with a look of pure adoration and that pure love is clearly a gift from God. Having two babies look at me like that while also looking at each other with love was sometimes too overwhelming for me to comprehend. Sort of like heaven. It's a love that is bigger than I can wrap my little brain around. God is bigger than anything I can imagine, yet with my children I feel he has given me a glimpse at his glory and the kind of love I can expect in heaven.
While a mother's work is never done, her reward is experiencing heaven on Earth.
You've heard the old adage, and it couldn't be more true. I've always considered myself a busy person. In high school and college I was involved in a lot of different organizations and sports and held leadership positions in many of them, all while keeping up my grades. I often felt overscheduled. After college I worked at a local television station where typically one's life should revolve around work in order to succeed. I worked long hours, weekends, holidays -- I was constantly on the go and always running from one shoot to another. BUSY. Or so I thought.
Fast forward a few years and I have my first child. Within a few weeks I realized I had never been this busy in my life. My husband and I talked about the biggest surprise for us was the continuousness of parenthood. Not that we expected it to be a 9-5 kind of gig, but just that there is no break. Ever. I went back to work in 3 months and found the work/life balance was difficult to say the least. It was managable, but I never felt 100% committed to my job or 100% like a good mother. I've heard this is common and pretty much how many mothers feel for the rest of their lives.
Once the hectic, newborn, holy-crap-I-have-a-baby-to-take-care-of period passed, I found a rountine and rhythm to my daily life. Yet, nothing prepared me for twins. NOTHING. CAN. PREPARE. YOU. FOR. TWINS. From the overwhelming nausea I had 24 hours a day to the constant discomfort I felt as I grew and grew and GREW, my twins' pregnancy was a strong indicator at just how different this time around was going to be. Once my twins were born, life became a juggling act with little to no sleep and more people depending on me than ever before. When people say, "I had kids one year apart, so that's the same thing as twins or even harder than twins" (which I've heard more frequently than you'd think) I want to:
1. laugh at them and their ridiculous lie
2. ask them how many babies came out of their ladytown in the span of 20 minutes
3. ask if their oldest kid could hold its head up when the baby was born (try holding two babies who both need head/neck support)
4. ask if they breastfed both of their kids at the same time. around the clock. every day.
5. find out where they get their drugs that distort reality and request they them share with me
I look back now and laugh at how easy it was to have only one baby to take care of. I only had to load/unload one baby into the car in the rain. I only had to get up in the middle of the night when one baby cried. I got to nap when my baby napped because I didn't have a 2-year-old who needed my attention.
How did I ever think having one baby was hard?
Clearly, the adjustment period from 0-1 kid is tough. Going from only worrying about myself to making this other little person my top priority for everything is definitely a life change. It is a change I was happy to make and one that I'm so glad I did make, but it was still a grown up moment.
Finding time to myself when the twins were newborns and my oldest daughter was not even 2 and half years old was impossible. If I could go to the bathroom alone, it was a freaking vacation. If I could get a shower in every 3 days, I was happy (I'm sure my husband was as well). I was breastfeeding about 10-12 hours a day, every day and changing about 30 diapers a day because our toddler was not yet potty trained. This didn't leave much time for eating and sleeping, let alone any time for myself.
I don't want this to sound like a "woe is me" kind of speech. While I had a lot to deal with, I am extremely blessed to have a supportive husband who is very hands on as a parent as well as family who helps us in so many ways. There are so many moms who deal with situations that are much more difficult from kids with special needs, to being a single mom to having a parent away serving in the miltary to caring for children with health problems. I feel so blessed that my children -- who sometimes make me want to pull out my hair -- are, and always have been, healthy. This is a gift that I cherish and for which I am extremely grateful.
My life as a mom of 3 was, at times, sad and overwhelming, but is also an amazing experience filled with many joyful, thankful moments with these children who I grew and birthed and now have the immense honor of raising. I remember so many times when the twins were just days/weeks old, looking at them in awe at how they are so different, yet so connected to each other. I remember being so bleary-eyed and exhausted, but looking into their little faces and getting teary at what precious miracles there were and how blessed I am to be their mother. I still have moments like that, but I believe those first few months with your baby is about as close as one can get to being in a room with God. There's a quote by Charles Dickens that I keep coming back to: "It is no small thing that they, who are so fresh from God, love us." Babies stare at their mommy with a look of pure adoration and that pure love is clearly a gift from God. Having two babies look at me like that while also looking at each other with love was sometimes too overwhelming for me to comprehend. Sort of like heaven. It's a love that is bigger than I can wrap my little brain around. God is bigger than anything I can imagine, yet with my children I feel he has given me a glimpse at his glory and the kind of love I can expect in heaven.
While a mother's work is never done, her reward is experiencing heaven on Earth.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Lots of Big Questions, Not a Lot of Time
I'm starting fresh.
Clearly it's been a while since I've found/made time to write a blog post. I'm going to work harder to make time. Guess what I've learned? I will never NOT be busy, so I need to find a way to do the things that need to get done (kids fed, clothed, happy) so that I can make time to do the things I enjoy (working out, writing and reading). I have already kickstarted the workout plan and now it's time to kickstart my writing schedule as well.
Today's post is just to give you a brief overview of topics that I plan to cover in the upcoming posts with the hope that you'll check back in and read them. I seem to have a lot of big questions swirling around in my head as of late and not a lot of time to truly dig into them. I hope to dive in to each subject and see what sense I can make from it. Feel free to weigh in and let me know which ones interest you most and which ones you have strong opinions about. Now to my list of upcoming topics:
Clearly it's been a while since I've found/made time to write a blog post. I'm going to work harder to make time. Guess what I've learned? I will never NOT be busy, so I need to find a way to do the things that need to get done (kids fed, clothed, happy) so that I can make time to do the things I enjoy (working out, writing and reading). I have already kickstarted the workout plan and now it's time to kickstart my writing schedule as well.
Today's post is just to give you a brief overview of topics that I plan to cover in the upcoming posts with the hope that you'll check back in and read them. I seem to have a lot of big questions swirling around in my head as of late and not a lot of time to truly dig into them. I hope to dive in to each subject and see what sense I can make from it. Feel free to weigh in and let me know which ones interest you most and which ones you have strong opinions about. Now to my list of upcoming topics:
- 24 hours is not enough: Finding time for everything, including myself
- Working at home or working outside the home: Every mom's choice/dilemma
- Self worth is heredity: Accepting myself just as I am so I can empower my children to do the same
- Learning from our elders: What lesssons can we learn from our parents, grandparents to become better people
- Married and still dating: How to date your husband again so life is more than just your children
- What do I want to do with my life? What should come next for me? Working outside the home, return to school or something completing different? Who knows, but I think many moms are thinking the same thing.
- "Who Rules the World? Girls!" How do I raise my children to be strong, independent women while being a stay-at-home mom? Do they have to be mutually exclusive?
- The Feminist Mystique: What does being a feminist really mean and why is it a bad word in our society?
- Putting Christ first: Raising my children in a Christian environment and the difficulties/successes of that
- Being healthy makes me a better mommy, wife, employee, and PERSON. Keeping a fitness plan going, what that will entail, and why it's important to me
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